25 (really 26) Things About Me

This is something people are doing on Facebook, so I wanted to post it on here too. I had to break the rules just a little and do 26.

1. Meeting Rob was the best thing that ever happened to me. I called my mom the next day and told her I had met the man I was going to marry. When she asked me about him I didn’t have much to say because I had only talked with him about 5 minutes but I just knew. Rob has been the best husband and friend I could ever ask for. He has been my rock in hard times and supported me in everything. He still makes me laugh and he still makes me weak in the knees! I am so proud of him and all of his accomplishments. He is also the best father I could have picked for my children. Raising a family with him has been wonderful.
2. I admire my daughter so much. The wisdom that flows from her mouth is so mature that sometimes I can’t believe what I am hearing. She has taken her brother’s disability in stride and she truly loves him. Since the day we adopted Ben her patience with him and all the changes he brought along has been amazing. She is enthusiastic for life beyond belief and she gives everything she’s got in all situations, she never holds back!! I am blessed to be her mom.
3. From the moment I laid eyes on Ben I knew he had to be ours. Adopting him was one of the most incredible decisions Rob and I have ever made. We had no idea what we were getting into but we knew we had more love to give and we desperately wanted another child. Life with Ben has had its ups and downs but the highs outweigh the lows a million times over. Ben has taught me more about love, life and loss then anything else ever has. Every day Ben amazes me with his ability to learn, love and persevere. He is truly an amazing child who has filled my heart with more love than I knew I could have. I am proud to be his mommy.
4. If I had my life to do over I wouldn’t change a thing, not one second, not one breath.
5. I am convinced you can learn everything you ever need to know in life on the soccer field.
6. I don’t think you could ever pay a teacher enough.
7. I think being a parent is the hardest job in the world but the most rewarding.
8. If you have to take test to drive a car why don’t you have to take a test to parent? Seriously.
9. I love to cook and wish I had more time to do it. I also love to read cookbooks and have a collection of well over 100.
10. I think every little girl (and big girl) needs a big brother. I wish Becca had one. My brother Kevin has always been my biggest cheerleader and advocate.
11. My dad is the smartest man I know. He is also a lot of fun to hang out with. I think it is very telling of what kind of parent you are when your kids grow up and they want to hang out with you because they consider you a friend. I feel this way about both of my parents. I am a lucky girl.
12. My mom is an incredible artist. It is amazing to me what she can do with a few pastels and a piece of paper. I am so proud of her hard work!!
13. I am scared of snakes, fire, drowning, and artificial sweeteners and colorings.
14. I still want to run a marathon, bungee jump, sky dive and go to culinary school.
15. I still believe in Santa.
16. I love working with children that have autism. It is truly my passion. I think these kiddos have a lot to say about the world that we are just not tuned into and too dense to figure out!!
17. I wish I had had the chance to meet my Granddaddy Parker, my mom’s dad.
18. I wish I had more self-discipline and that I took better care of myself!!
19. I am so disorganized, I try but I just can’t do it!! Thank goodness Rob keeps me in line otherwise I know I would forget to do everything.
20. I love sports. I find myself watching golf on TV when there are no other sports to watch. March madness is my favorite!!! I have always wanted to take time off of work so I can just sit and watch all the games.
21. I am VERY competitive. It is bad. I am in it to win it. I drive Rob crazy. We fight (I fight!!!) over Wii games, basketball games in the pool, etc. Everything is about keeping score. Poor Rob ……. (By the way, I won both of my football pools this year, pro and college and I plan on winning basketball)
22. I hate the mall. I hate to shop. Unless it is Target and I can put some money down at Target
23. My favorite saying is “Peace Out!” I say it all the time. I didn’t realize it until my friends pointed it out. Even my adorable 4-year-old niece started saying it over Christmas. I was very proud!!! .
24. I am very opinionated and out spoken, but I think everyone knows that.
25. Some of the best friends I have ever had in my life I have made at my current job. They get me. They understand Ben and the struggles of raising a child with disabilities. They truly care and love me for me. I love them and am blessed by them daily.
26. I am blessed. I love my life and am grateful for my beautiful children and amazing husband.

Changes

Has it really been over two month since I last blogged?? Good heavens. The holidays were joyous and very busy. My family came the 26th and all 11 of us cramped into the house along with the crazy dogs. Boy was it worth it!! What a blast we had. I got to meet my beautiful niece Kelsey and hang out with my incredible family. The highlight for the little girls, and I think the big girls too, was a trip to the American Girl doll store. I think all of us ladies could have spent a million dollars on clothes and accessories. I guess I did a lot of talking about it because sweet Rob surprised me with my own doll a few days later!!!

We have made some incredible strides since the beginning of this year. With the awesome encouragement of our family trainer, yes it takes a trainer to help Rob and I get our stuff in order!!! We have gotten Ben sleeping through the night!!!!!!!!! It seems amazing we really did it after fighting him for 3 and 1/2 years. We have gone from awakening 10-20 times a night (literally) to all of us sleeping peacefully. The sad thing is, all it took was me talking to Ben about it, priming him, and us ignoring his cries and outbursts during the night. Now don't get me wrong, Ben does still wake up, but Rob and I just roll over knowing he has given up on us. He is now calling for all other family members and his teachers. So if you hear a pitiful "Jo Jo", "Kevin" or "Nurse Pam" in the middle of the night just roll over he will give up on you too, eventually!!!  

We all feel much more rested and ecstatic  that this is finally under control.

The crazy thing is we have now realized Ben understands so much more than we ever imagined. It is amazing and awesome but I do feel guilty I never clued into this before. Anyway, now that we know this we are able to combat so many behaviors before they even began by preparing him for changes, etc. Yes, I feel so dumb, I tell parents this all day, "Just prime him before hand" "Explain what is going on". But I guess with Ben there have been so many mysteries we were never able to focus on what he could actually do versus what he couldn't do. I think I have spent so much time worried about what he was missing out on and what he couldn't do that I wasn't seeing the incredible things he was able to do and understand. I think this has opened a whole new window for us. I told Ben the other day "Go get a kleenex from the bathroom and wipe your nose." Lo and behold the sweet pumpkin did exactly that and then took it to the kitchen trash can and threw it away!!! SERIOUSLY, what have I been doing?? I think it is called mourning, worrying and feeling sorry for myself and Ben. Good God I love the adorable kid but his life is about to change and so is ours, sorry Buddy Boy but we will all be the better for it!!

Election

No matter your political stances or beliefs I think every American should be proud of what happened today. Although it was over 200 years in the making, we should be proud that we as a country have elected an African-American as president. We have also given a darn good fight for women in this election and I think many barriers have been broken over the last year. We should be proud that it came down to issues and not sex or race. Isn't that what our Founding Fathers meant for this country. I personally feel a weight lifted from my shoulders. I hope you can too.

Political Junkie

Becca is a bit sad tonight. She thought today would be the big day before Hillary won the presidential election. Seriously, she mourned for days after Hillary did not get the nomination for the democratic party. I think her exact quote was,  "She is a nice lady, we need a woman. Really have they not looked at her smile. She has the best smile of anyone I know." I guess I didn't know she and Hillary were so tight!! 

Rob and I had prepped her that it was likely that Obama would get the nomination, but I think we were the ones not quite prepared for her anguish. As the months have passed she has been watching the news and asking questions. We literally find her watching the news in the mornings, sometimes the local channels but often watching what she calls the "real news" -CNN, not "mommy's news"-the local channels. Over time she has decided that Barack is her man, even though he made a "HUGE" mistake not choosing Hillary as a running mate. She likes his stance on many issues (I swear I am serious) and likes the idea of the first African-American president. She has even been quoted as saying, "I think he will make good decisions for Ben's benefit". (You gotta love this girl!!!). This was after watching several news segments on the candidates' stances for funding for special needs.

 We will see what the next four years brings, but she is still holding out hope for Hillary in 2012.....who knows maybe someday it will be my Becca Boo!!!

"A-sund-a-toad"

Ben had been asking for something that sounded like "a-sund-a-toad" for several weeks, seriously standing at the frig screaming this mystery word. Or when I forgot the child safety lock rummaging thru the frig throwing over his shoulder everything that was not "a-sund-a-toad" glass jars and all. We had tried naming everything......strawberry-NO (at the top of his lungs sometimes with some other mal-adaptive behavior), banana-NO, cheese-NO, cheesestick-NO, cookie-NO, chicken-(you got it) NO, pancake, milk, beer, pizza, chips, cheetos, graham crackers, hot dog, ham, turkey.........Finally, two Saturdays ago at my wits end I said "potato" "YIPPY" screamed Ben as he ran through the house screaming "a-sund-a-toad" Thank God, I was detective of the year, mystery solved. I rummaged thru the pantry to find one lone potato, we hadn't had potatoes in multiple weeks. But there he was gleaming ready for the microwave, no growths, or buds just a beautiful baking potato. I threw that puppy down and baked him up. As I cut him open I noticed an odd green color on the inside, hey at this point nothing was going to detour me from feeding my baby boy his potato. As I was mixing in the works; cheese, ranch dressing, etc. the color started to nag me. I mentioned it to Rob and he decided to google it. Ben was loving his first few bites, he was truly in heaven, when Rob said "Hey, you may want to stop that." Seriously are you kidding me??? Ben was happy, mommy was happy, hell even the dogs were happy. Rob went on to say there were questionable things on the internet about green potatoes and  toxins, since when do we believe what we read on the net??? Rob decided he would run to Wendy's where they have baked potatoes ready to order. Great idea!!! He was gone for what seemed like a lifetime, only 15 minutes, but the whole time Ben was throwing things, hitting me, the dogs, and himself and screaming like nothing I had ever heard. Rob raced in the back door and I threw in the fixin's and tried everything to cool the steaming hot thing down. (Ben finds only room temperature foods edible.) Finally, it was ready and what does my amazing, incredible, adorable son do? Eat two bites, and he was done! SERIOUSLY!! I am now keeping a box of mashed potatoes at the ready.......lesson learned!

Gimpy Ben

This morning Ben decided to bless us with a sleep-in. Rob and Becca took off to her early morning soccer game in 40 degree weather (I pulled the long straw I will get to go to her 1pm game tomorrow!!!!!). When Ben decided it was time to get out of his crib at 9 I bounded upstairs full of energy and vigor (yea right you all know better than that). I lifted him out and set him on his feet and he crumbled to the ground crying. I picked him back up and he started limping around and headed very slowly to the stairs. It was impossible to get him to go down the stairs because he wouldn't bear much weight on his left foot. I am so glad he is such a petite child and I can bound down the stairs holding him in one arm!!! (do I need to say "yea right!!"?) Anyway after letting him hobble around for a while and resort to crawling I decided to call his doctor. God love the sweet guy he takes phone calls on his cell phone!!!! He said since Ben can't tell us what hurts and how it got hurt and because he was perfectly fine last night we should head to the er. Thankfully, again God love the man, he told me that the new Childrens' Hospital satellite er was open just 4 miles down the road so we wouldn't have to head downtown to that Children's. I waited for Rob and Bec to get home and we headed south 4 miles. Since all of Ben's extensive history is in their system it makes the whole triage/paperwork much more pleasant. Anyway, 12 x-rays later and 2 short hours later we left with the diagnosis of a sprained ankle that must have occurred during the night when he either got his foot stuck between the crib and mattress or in between the crib slats......evil crib!!!! Anyway, thank God for good doctors, sweet nurses, x-ray machines, x-ray technicians who can stand getting the s@#$%@$% beat out of them by a cute 3 year old, close hospitals and a patient and sweet big sister who helped entertain him the whole time!

Everything Becca will ever need to know she is learning on the soccer field

Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose

Don't be a ball hog 

Listen to your coach 

Your parents will embarrass you (especially when they high step down the sidelines high fiving all the parents after good plays) but it is only because they love you and they can't help themselves 

Work hard, play hard

Practice

Trust your teammates

Be a good team player

Fine tune your personal skills and practices those things you don't like as much or aren't as good at

Be a good sport

Sometimes there are rainouts

Cheer on others

Clap when the other team scores

Always shake hands

If you score a goal thank your teammates for their support

Protect your goalie

Never be cocky

There is no crying in soccer (I am just kidding....)

Follow the rules

Take care of your injuries

Rest during halftime

Drink plenty of water

Sometimes the ref will make a bad call

Sometimes things aren't fair

Different parents and coaches have different rules and expectations

You my get knocked down, but try your best to get up

Give it your best shot

Congratulate the other team at the end of the game

Don't cheat

Never give up

It ain't over till the fat lady sings

Break a sweat

Play till you think you can't play anymore

But most of all ALWAYS have fun!!!!!