e highlight for the little girls, and I think the big girls too, was a trip to the American Girl doll store. I think all of us ladies could have spent a million dollars on clothes and accessories. I guess I did a lot of talking about it because sweet Rob surprised me with my own doll a few days later!!!We have made some incredible strides since the beginning of this year. With the awesome encouragement of our family trainer, yes it takes a trainer to help Rob and I get our stuff in order!!! We have gotten Ben sleeping through the night!!!!!!!!! It seems amazing we really did it after fighting him for 3 and 1/2 years. We have gone from awakening 10-20 times a night (literally) to all of us sleeping peacefully. The sad thing is, all it took was me talking to Ben about it, priming him, and us ignoring his cries and outbursts during the night. Now don't get me wrong, Ben does still wake up, but Rob and I just roll over knowing he has given up on us. He is now calling for all other family members and his teachers. So if you hear a pitiful "Jo Jo", "Kevin" or "Nurse Pam" in the middle of the night just roll over he will give up on you too, eventually!!!
We all feel much more rested and ecstatic that this is finally under control.
The crazy thing is we have now realized Ben understands so much more than we ever imagined. It is amazing and awesome but I do feel guilty I never clued into this before. Anyway, now that we know this we are able to combat so many behaviors before they even began by preparing him for changes, etc. Yes, I feel so dumb, I tell parents this all day, "Just prime him before hand" "Explain what is going on". But I guess with Ben there have been so many mysteries we were never able to focus on what he could actually do versus what he couldn't do. I think I have spent so much time worried about what he was missing out on and what he couldn't do that I wasn't seeing the incredible things he was able to do and understand. I think this has opened a whole new window for us. I told Ben the other day "Go get a kleenex from the bathroom and wipe your nose." Lo and behold the sweet pumpkin did exactly that and then took it to the kitchen trash can and threw it away!!! SERIOUSLY, what have I been doing?? I think it is called mourning, worrying and feeling sorry for myself and Ben. Good God I love the adorable kid but his life is about to change and so is ours, sorry Buddy Boy but we will all be the better for it!!
2 comments:
Here is my vote for encouragement. Guilt is often the largest obstacle in front of us. It is so large, we fail to see what is on the other side. It is also a weight on our shoulders that we hesitate to shake off. The feeling of relief and happiness seem to wipe the guilt and hesitance away. I am happy for all of you, may your days be full of forward steps and not many lateral (I will not say backward, you must always keep your eyes on the prize.) Ben is a lucky little boy to have so many people love him - even though we don't see him we love him. Keep in mind where he would be if it weren't for you, Rob, and Becca. He is blessed!
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